Tag Archive for ‘Self Compassion’

No Screaming Banshees Allowed

I woke up this morning and thought “I can’t wait for this week to be over.” I immediately started thinking about everything I need to get done and where I need to be at what time and trying not to be mad at myself for things I didn’t know…

Okay, let me back up a bit. This week is the last week of volleyball with tonight being Senior Night. Until 9:00 last night, I had no details about what we needed to do, what time we needed to be at the gym, what would be expected of us…I had no info and neither did my Volleyball Player and having no info makes me a little anxious. I finally texted another Senior Mom to ask if she had heard anything and she hadn’t, but she had a call in to the coach. A little while later she texted me back and told me what time to be at the gym and oh yeah, Senior Parents are supposed to decorate the locker room today (Monday).

Son of biscuit eater.

Granted, I should have done some asking around last week but I’ve been preoccupied with some extended family stuff and other things. And honestly, I have never been, nor will I ever be, THAT classroom mom who has her shit together and thinks ahead about things like decorating or getting (or God forbid, making) cute little gift for all the Seniors. Luckily, one of the other Senior Moms is that mom (and I thank God for her every day!)  and is going to decorate today, so it will get done but I’m so frustrated that none of what is expected was communicated to us. Is this common knowledge that I “should” have known about? And how would anyone be expected to know if they’ve never had a Senior in a sport before??? I’m so frustrated right now. I am going to get my Senior some flowers, but is there anything else I’m supposed to know? I guess it’s too late now anyway.  :/

Tomorrow is the Volleyball Player’s 18th birthday, but they have an away game tomorrow night, so we are going to celebrate her birthday on Wednesday. I’m running through all the things that I need to get for her tomorrow and Wednesday and all the errands I need to run, then on Thursday, they have the Regionals tournament which I will have to help provide snacks for (along with a table and a cooler). I guess I could do cute little gifts for the other Seniors then? That might be an idea…

Anyway, all of that to say: this is a busy week with a lot going on, so I need to make sure I make time to do the things that will save my sanity. Which feels counter-intuitive because my Emotion Mind is screaming “PUT EVERYONE ELSE FIRST!!! YOU DON’T HAVE TIME FOR SELF CARE!!!” to which I say “SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP YES I DO!!” I have made an appointment on Wednesday to get my hair cut (these are some bad hair times, friends. My hair needs an intervention), I am going to somehow squeeze in a trip to the gym if only to sit in the massage chair for 20 minutes, I am going to make sure I drink a lot of water, eat some nutritious foods (I’ve already got a meal plan for the week with all the groceries bought. Vegetable beef stew is in the crockpot as we speak), get some movement in  – that might mean I walk laps in my office if nothing else, and my BFF and I are trying to make an overnight girls trip happen this weekend (<—this is the main thing keeping me going – I am really looking forward to this).

Even though this is going to be a busy week I have to make myself a priority, otherwise by Friday I will be a cranky screaming banshee and nobody wants that. Least of all me.

 

Stupid Black & White Swimsuit

Happy Post Labor Day!! Who’s still exhausted from the weekend? *Raises hand*

I had a great weekend, but man…it seems like having fun wears me out and it takes a while to recover. But it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make. 🙂

So, an interesting situation happened on Saturday. The fam and I went out in the boat for a little joyride and we found a nice little cove that was perfect for swimming. So we’re out there swimming and chilling and being all relaxed when another boat pulls into the cove. Then another boat. And another. And another. Pretty soon there were 6 or 8 boats in our cove and it was obvious they had planned to gather there and have a little Labor Day Weekend party. Coincidentally, my husband knew some of these people so we decided to join them, which was fine…at first.

The group was made up of 30-something couples (married or dating) and there were a few little kids running around splashing and swimming. I noticed that several of the women were wearing bikinis…not tankinis…but itty bitty bikinis and they didn’t look awful in them. They all actually looked pretty darn good. Dammit.

Remember, I’m 44 and roughly 60 pounds overweight.

Yeaahhhhhhhh.

Wanna recipe for disaster? Here ya go:

How to Make Yourself Feel Like a Beached Whale in 4 Easy Steps

  1. Be 60 pounds overweight
  2. Wear a black and white one piece swimsuit similar to this:shamu
  3. Surround yourself with hot mamas who are 15 years younger than yourself
  4. Wait for Greenpeace to show up and haul your arse back into the water

Tada!!

My husband could tell that my mood had shifted, so when he came to check on me, I decided to tell him why. I rarely tell him when things like this bother me, but I decided to be honest about it and I said “all these women in bikinis are making me feel bad”, to which he said some very sweet things which I will keep private, but I felt much better after our little talk. I realized that for whatever reason, my husband really does only have eyes for me. ❤

Unfortunately, I didn’t practice having self compassion that day.  But I realize this is a process and it will get easier. Giving myself a break will get easier and believing that I am worthy NO MATTER WHAT will get easier too.

But I’m DEFINITELY getting a different swimsuit next year.

🙂

For your weekend viewing pleasure

Here are some videos I’ve watched over the last few days that I thought were really inspiring. I think it will be well worth your time to watch these videos when you get some downtime over the weekend.

The first video is by Kristin Neff who specializes in Self Compassion. After watching this video, I realized that self compassion is typically something that we think is just a nice accessory, something that would be nice to have but we don’t really put a big effort into it…but guys, let me tell you it’s ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. She explains why very well.

The next video is by Gala Darling. I just really loved her message that women are powerful and we can make ourselves powerful.

I dig this next woman. Her accent is enough to keep me mesmerized, but I love her message – The Art of Being Yourself. Because you deserve to be who you are, not who someone else thinks you should be.

Can you tell I’m a big fan of Ted Talks? 🙂

What do you think of these videos? Any insights? Share below!

%d bloggers like this: