The Sassy Pear

Finding my way through my forties

Friday stuffs — March 15, 2013

Friday stuffs

Hey guys!!

Man, I am struggling this week. Actually the last 2 weeks have been difficult on the food-front and I’m ready for something to give. I find that I can handle my food so much better when I use 4 or 5 extra points a day as opposed to using all of them in one fell swoop. Unlike other bloggers (whom I love and admire), I cannot get right back on track after a day of an eating-free-for-all. When I spend all my extra weekly points in one day or when I have a cheat day, I can’t just pick up and become a healthy eater again the next day. I’ve tried and I just can’t do it. It takes me 3, 4, or even 5 days before residual effects of white carb overload subside and I can get back in the saddle.  I’ve fought hard this week, and I’ve made several good choices and decisions, but it’s far from where I need to be if I’m going to lose weight and keep it off. I’ll go to weigh in tomorrow, and I won’t be surprised by the (at least) 2 pound gain I’ll see on the scale.

In other news, I’ve decided to stop taking my birth control pill. I started taking this pill back in December in order to help balance my raging/insane hormones. I think it has helped a little, however since I’ve been on this pill I’ve gained 10 pounds and my libido has fallen like a brick off a cliff.  The trade off is not worth it for me – I got off the pill 7 years ago because my low libido was affecting my marriage and  I don’t want to go back there. I think I can do better with a different pill, so I’m going to quit the one I’m on now and see how my body reacts. I have my yearly appointment in May, so if my hormones go haywire, I can always get another pill in a couple of months. I also think that losing weight will help my hormones, so maybe if I can get some momentum and get this weight off, my body will work itself out. I’m going to finish out this pack that I’m on now ( I only have a few days left anyway) but then that’s it. I was trying to explain all this to my husband this morning and I ended with “you get what I’m saying here?” and he replied “that’s the only thing I’m getting lately” so obviously this is an issue! 🙂  (and in case you were wondering, my husband had the snip-snip several years ago, so BIRTH control really isn’t an issue, I take it for the hormones)

I’ve made an attempt this week at exercise. I managed to get in 3 days of walking so far this week – just me, the early morning, and Downton Abbey (I just finished season 2 – no spoilers please!). I would have had at least 4 days, but on Wednesday my alarm didn’t go off – I have no idea why. It was set for the right time, I checked the am/pm thing and it was correct, the radio was at a good volume – there is no reason that it shouldn’t have come on. Luckily I woke up just a few minutes later than my absolute-have-to-get-out-of-bed-right-NOW time, so I was only a couple of minutes behind in my morning routine. But anyway, I’m back to walking if only because I know I won’t lose weight as fast if I don’t, and because it just makes me feel better.

So that’s the super exciting goings-on in my life this week. Spring has finally sprung around here and we are looking at temps in the 80s later today. The rest of the weekend will be a little cooler (high 60s) but I’ll take it. I actually wore a tshirt and flip flops yesterday – it was that nice! I’m so ready for warm breezes and sunshine. This has been long cold winter.





Idea totally copped from FB — May 2, 2008

Idea totally copped from FB

I saw this on Fat Bridesmaid‘s blog and I thought it sounded like a good idea.   This might help give some insight as to why you have gained weight, therefore giving you an idea of what it might take to help you lose it.  Not sure why it is all past tense, but I just made it fit my current situation. 

1. What types of food were you most likely to overeat? Sweets, and noodle casseroles. Also Cheetos – can’t resist the call of the Cheeto.



2. What times of day did you overeat most often? Afternoon (when I was young it was right after school, now it’s right after work).



3. What feelings were you having most often when you overate? I think when I overeat now, it has to do with a feeling of relaxation and celebration – I’m so happy to be home, or I’m so happy it’s dinner time that I want to prolong the good feeling so I keep eating.



4. Do you think you have a binge eating disorder? No, I really don’t. I don’t binge nearly as much as I used to, and I have gotten fairly good at stopping myself before too much damage is done.



5. What circumstances in your life do you believe contributed to your weight gain? I was alone a lot when I was younger, and to entertain myself I ate while watching TV. I still haven’t learned how to keep myself entertained without food, but at least now, I am aware of it.



6. Do you ‘blame’ anyone for your weight? Nope – well, I guess I blame myself, but not anyone else. I just had/have poor coping skills, so I use food for comfort.



7. What other behaviors made you overweight? Not enough exercise, not caring for myself better.



8. Were you active or exercising while you gained weight? Off and on. That’s my biggest problem where exercise is concerned – I’m inconsistent.



9. What made you finally want to change? I don’t want to look matronly anymore. I’m not even 40 and I already look like my 68 year old mother. I also don’t want the health issues that she has. Also, I’m done having babies, so it’s time to lose the baby weight.

I thought this was a great exercise. Goals and realizations can get lost in the day to day of living, so it helps to revisit these things that made us want to lose weight in the first place. Feel free to take this and run with it and let me know if you do this on your blog.

Confession — October 1, 2007


 Okay, so lately I’ve been a bit of a whiner, as you may have noticed.  Lots of external stresses and too much cake have exacerbated the pity party, but I have been giving myself pep talks all weekend long and I think I have put the whiner baby to bed.  It’s hard making a change – just thinking about making a change is stressful.  I am trying to accept my body for what it is, but in reality, I need to lose some weight.  My body is at its breaking point and it is telling me it has had enough abuse.  My feet hurt from carrying around 40 extra pounds.  My back hurts from trying to keep “the girls” up where they belong.  My hips hurt at night and so do my arms from laying on them.  And I’m just tired…physically, mentally, emotionally. I’m tired of being tired all the time.   So even though I really admire all of you who are anti-diet, and total body acceptance oriented, I’m afraid I need some help.

 Some people are really good at the whole diet game.  They can eat minimal amounts of food or exercise like crazy and have motivation enough for a Mary Kay seminar.  They drop pounds fast and keep them off.  I am not one of those people.  I have never been accused of being too skinny, or not eating enough, even when I was 108 pounds in college I could scarf a burger, fries, and shake, and still eat a full meal at 10:00 at night.  But now I’m 176 pounds and for the last 10 years I have struggled to take the weight off.  So I need some help, and even though I am a little afraid to admit it, I need to do what I need to do FOR ME. 

I have joined the SparkPeople website. I like the approach they take, it’s not too rigid, and is just a way to be accountable to myself, and to others if I so choose.  I track the calories I eat and adjust my eating accordingly.  I am astounded at how much I eat in a day and I know I can live on a lot less.  I also really like their approach to exercise.  Start small, and gradually build up.  I know I have heard all of this before, but seeing it and being able to track it, makes a lot of difference for me.  Being able to do it on my terms and no one else’s is a huge help, and I love earning the points for trophies!  I like the acceptance and support of the message boards, and all the resources in the form of articles, quizzes, and emails.  So even though I feel like a traitor to the IE community, I really feel like this is the direction I want to take right now.  I’ll let you know how it goes.

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