The Sassy Pear

Finding my way through my forties

Not as ready as I thought I was. — March 4, 2019

Not as ready as I thought I was.

Hey there! So I always put off writing for one reason or another and then before I know it, a month has gone by. I have an actual list of blog topics but I guess I’m always waiting for a good time to sit down and write but that “good time” never seems to present itself. So today I’m just going to write even though there are other things I need to be doing but I need to get today’s topic off my chest. Today’s topic is brought to you by the fact that I’m getting older and my kids are getting older and they’re leaving the nest and I’m a tiny bit freaked out about all of it. Fun stuff!!

My tiny baby first-born son (who is a fully bearded, 200 pound 22 year old) is moving into his own apartment this week and even though I’ve been after him for a year to get out on his own, now that it’s finally happening, I’m not sure how I feel about it. Actually I do know how I feel about it – I’m nervous and scared and excited for him and anxious and all the other emotions too. I’m scared that I pushed him before he’s ready, I’m afraid  that he’ll be lonely, I’m nervous that he’ll sit in his apartment and stare at a screen 24/7. I’m hopeful, however, that he’ll love having his own space (and a bathroom that he doesn’t have to share with his sisters), I pray that he’ll figure out what he wants to do with his life and maybe go back to school, I want him to find a job and friends that he likes (but only the kind of friends that are good for him and aren’t secretly a cult), I want him to find a nice girl to date (actually never mind that one – he’s got plenty of time for that later…when he’s 30…ish.) I’ve gotten so spoiled by having all my kids still at home where I knew they were safe and well-fed and had someone to talk to every day. I hope he’ll be okay. I hope I’ll be okay.

Oh, and in 6 months my tiny baby second-born (who is 5’8″ and strong and will beat the ass of anyone who looks at her or any friend of hers crossways) is moving to college an hour away. At least she’ll be rooming with a friend and be in the dorms where other people can be there to tell her not to ignore her check engine light…so that gives me some comfort. She is going to love living on her own. I’m excited for her but I know I’ll be a mess the day she moves out.

That will leave my husband and I with our last tiny baby – our 13 year old daughter who is full of friend-drama and hormones – at least I’ve still got her for another 4.5 years, so that’s good. Unless she turns into a teenage she-devil, at which point I will move in with my son, but I’ve got my fingers crossed we can weather that storm.

For those of you who have kids that have moved out, any tips on making things easier? Or just tips in general for this transition? Because this stuff is hard!!


I put in “leaving the nest” in Amazon and this came up:

What??? I mean…what??? Why would you…????


Or would you prefer some french cries with your waaaamburger? — August 7, 2009

Or would you prefer some french cries with your waaaamburger?

You know I kind of almost expected someone to say “get over it Jill – quit yer bitchin!” in regards to my last post, but as usual you all came through for me and let me know that  I am not alone in this.  The comments on that one were long (btw, don’t ever apologize for leaving a long comment – I LOVE IT) and kind and super helpful.  Sometimes I just need to hear that I’m not the losery loser I think I am at times, and that was the push I needed last night. 

I finally tackled that disgusting kitchen floor o’ mine.  A couple of days ago, Mallory (the youngest) spilled some tea on the floor and tried to clean it up with the mop (unbeknownst to me).  All she did was spread it around the ENTIRE floor so that it was sticky and a slight shade of brown.  Last night I grabbed the tea-stained-and-soaked mop to do a quick once over, and realized that all I was doing was pushing dirty water around.  I threw the whole dang mop in the trash (it was a cheap piece o’ crap anyway), grabbed a wet dishcloth and mopped the floor by hand. Well it wasn’t by hand, it was by foot.  I used my foot to swish the rag around the floor and would rinse it out every couple of minutes in the sink. Not only did my floor get clean, I also got a good cardio work out.  In fact I think I might market it to the general public as the new exercise craze:  The Cardio Mop!  Disinfect your floors while you tone your buns and thighs!!  I would have had Billy Mays do the infomercials for me, but since he’s not available anymore, do you think the ShamWow guy would be interested?

Anyway, I also forced my houligans asked my lovely children to help me unload the dishwasher, put the dirty dishes in, and wipe off the counters.  They did, and it took all of 15 minutes. I then sat down and read a magazine. It was nice to be able to relax. Oh, and since I had an appointment after work, I didn’t get home til 6pm, upon which I noticed smoke coming from my backyard. I ran around the back in a near panic, but discovered to my delight that Shawn had fired up the grill and was cooking steaks!  So not only did I NOT have to clean the kitchen by myself, I also didn’t even have to cook!  Double Woo!!

I think I’m also going to have the kids do the majority of their own laundry. I know my oldest is capable of doing all of his on his own, my 8 year will probably need some help, but that’s okay, and if I let Mallory do her own, well that would just be a catastrophe waiting to happen. I think I would feel better knowing that they were at least making an effort to help – doing a chore with someone else makes it so much easier!   Matthew has also expressed an interest in learning how to cook, so lately I’ve had him peeling potatoes, chopping onions, browning meat – easy stuff like that.  If he wants to make something from a box, like a cake or brownies, I give him the box and say “do what the directions say” and if he has questions, I help him, but mostly I just let him have at it.  If this keeps up, there may come a day or two in the not-so-distant future where I don’t have to cook!  Triple Woo!!

I feel much better today, and not so glum about the state of my house.  I’ll just involve the kids more, and hopefully if we all work at it, it will stay reasonably clean. 

I have a giveaway from Mussellman’s Applesauce that I am going to try and post tonight, so you might want to check back this evening for that. 

I am particularly happy today because today is my last day of work for a week!  I’m taking off next week for a quickquick vacation with the family, and then the kiddos start school next Thursday, so I want to be around in case Mallory has a meltdown or anything since this will be her first year of “big school”. She’s going into Pre-K, and even though she went to preschool last year, this is a little bit different.  So yay for no dayjob next week!! 

Gotta get my work done now though, so I can take off with out any loose ends hanging around.  Ciao bellas!!

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