I survived Sr. Night – it was a really nice evening and I’m now pretty much over the whole not-meeting-my-goal thing. I think the next emotional hurdle will be the Winter Concert – my son has been in band since he was in 5th grade, so we’ve gone to this concert every year since then. I love this concert – it sort of rings in the Christmas season for me (it’s early in December) and it’s so interesting to hear how the grades progress. Yes I even love hearing the first year band students struggling through Jingle Bells! And by the time the high school students play, it really sounds lovely. This will most likely be the last Winter Concert we attend (unless I attend by myself – the rest of the family isn’t so into it) and that makes me sad. Just thinking about it makes me tear up!!

I wonder why these big milestones are such tear-jerkers? Graduating high school should be a happy time, but I can’t stop thinking about how things will be changing for him and for the rest of us. For so many years when my kids were in elementary and middle school, things just moved along steadily and predictably…not changing much year after year. But now, my son is graduating, then in a couple of years my daughter will driving, then she’ll graduate, then my youngest will be in high school and graduating. It feels like all the changes are going to come faster and faster until they’ll all be grown up and gone. I’m not ready for our little family unit to break apart!!!

SO MANY FEELS! CANNOT HANDLE ALL THE FEELS!

(BRB. Full on tears now)

Okay, I’m composed now. My makeup looks like sh*t, but oh well. No one’s here today anyway, so I can get away with looking all puffy and red-nosed for awhile.

Wow, this post has taken a hard left turn from where I originally intended it to go. Yikes.

You know what’s really crazy? My son isn’t even leaving home after he graduates. He’s going to a local college so he can live at home and save some money while he gets his general credits out of the way, then he’ll transfer to a 4 year college in a couple of years. All these tears are just because I know that our lives are transitioning…and apparently I don’t handle transition well.

All day yesterday I felt sad and tired and just plain lazy. I couldn’t figure out why until this morning when I realized that I haven’t taken an allergy pill in several days. Maybe taking the allergy pill will help my current emotional state – maybe when this bomb cyclone trickles down to us here it will kill all the allergens and I won’t need an allergy pill anymore. I don’t know why having allergies makes me sad – maybe it’s a by-product of being tired?? I don’t know, but I do know it sucks.

So…I need to list some good things.

  • We are combining families this Thanksgiving, having my husband’s parents and sister over as well as having my sister and her family over. I’m looking forward to it although it’s going to be a lot of work to get ready. But I’ve got my husband and kids to help with that – just have to buckle down and start doing it. I’ve already got a menu and a shopping list completed, and I have everything I need to set up.
  • My boss is gone to regional meetings all week long – I get the office to myself!! For some reason, this feels really indulgent.
  • Zumba. Zumba feels good right now. I started going to a new class and I really like it. I liked the old class, but they moved to a location that isn’t very big and this new class is at a gym where there is lots of room. Also the instructor is a fireball of energy and she makes it a lot of fun. She is also NOT thin. She’s probably my height and I would say she is around a size 12/14, and I absolutely love seeing someone who isn’t perfectly sculpted get up there and lead the class with confidence. I’ve been going on Thursdays, but I might start going more often if I can swing it.

I think that’s enough for a Monday. I hope you all had a lovely weekend! 🙂