The Aggravating, The Anxious, & The Good Stuff

Amanda (my favorite dietitian) and I had a really good session the other day in which she suggested that to help combat some emotional eating issues I’ve been dealing with lately, I should write more. How convenient that I already have a place where I can write to my heart’s content!! My aim is to write daily…my reality is that I’ll probably write a few times a week, so you’ll be seeing more of my ramblings here starting…now.

Writing really does help me work through things – if I can get it out on paper, or a screen as the case may be, then I don’t have to think about it anymore; I literally feel like weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Walking is another avenue we discussed for managing my issues, but I haven’t put that one into motion much this week. I’m working on it.

But I don’t want this blog to just be a dumping grounds for all my emotional garbage, so I am going to also include some good things, if only to remind myself that there are LOTS of good things happening in my life (because I don’t always focus on those things).

So I’m just going to jump in…

The Aggravating: I got really irritated with my son earlier this evening – I was cooking dinner and I needed to leave to take my daughter to a youth group activity so I asked my son to watch the pasta that was boiling on the stove (I thought it would be finished cooking before I needed to leave – I was wrong). When I got home a half hour later, he was stirring what can only be described as mushy pieces of mush in the pan. He had gotten distracted by a project he was working on (he was looking through some family pictures – I should have made him stop what he was doing and pay attention to the pasta) and forgot to check it. It didn’t burn…but it was definitely waaaay overcooked. We threw that out in the trash and I had to start over with the pasta, and then by the time it was finished I had to leave again to pick up my daughter. So it was much later than I wanted it to be by the time I finally sat down to eat dinner. Annoying.

The Anxious: Something else coming up for me is Senior Night on Friday night for my son who is graduating next May. For Senior Night, parents have to walk their Senior to the middle of the football field where they get recognized and I’m not even sure what else happens. I am not looking forward to having hundreds of people watch me walk across a football field in all my overweight, waddling glory. I realize that the focus of this is not me – this is my son’s time and he’ll be the center of attention (well one of the centers of attention, anyway), so I need to just get over myself. Also, it’s going to be cold, so I plan on bundling up in my favorite winter coat and my dark wash jeans and boots and calling it good. I just hope the wind cooperates and blows my hair so that it is OFF my face and not whipping around getting stuck in my lip gloss. Note to self: wear waterproof mascara. I cry at the drop of a hat lately and if I think of my son turning into an almost-man, the waterworks start up and it’s hard to turn them off. Being super sensitive is fun!

The Good Stuff: My hair has been playing nice lately; all my kids are healthy; I just finished a really good book (Take Me With You by Catherine Ryan Hyde). I know that’s not very much but that’s about all I’ve got in me tonight. I’m tired and ready to head for bed. I actually love the time change – I start getting ready for bed at 7:30 – I don’t make it to bed until 10:00, but I start getting ready at 7:30. 🙂

Sleep tight!

Jill

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5 thoughts on “The Aggravating, The Anxious, & The Good Stuff

  1. Writing does help or at least I think so. But hey, I’m a writer! I enjoyed this post. Keep up the work – it’s good inspiration for me to stick with my program too.

  2. You so rock for putting it all out there!! Thank you! I so get your anxious! I have an upcoming trip with extended family that will have me in a bathing suit every day for a week….ahhhhhhhh! I have been working on reminding myself that my mother’s judgement about my weigh and my weigh itself, DOES NOT define me!! Do I want to be 50 pounds lighter and in a healthy weigh range? A resounding yes!! However, I am healthy!! I walk daily, interval workout 4 days a week, make good food choices 80% of the time, love and get mad at my family passionately!, surround myself with amazing friends…I am healthy!! My weight does not define me! That will be my mantra for that bathing suit week, so that I can focus on enjoying my family, seeing my boys at the beach for the very first time, and giving myself the love and compassion I deserve!

    I hope you do the same, because you deserve to enjoy this amazing moment with your son!!! 🙂

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