I’m struggling this week, I won’t lie. I haven’t worked out since last week and I’m falling back into old food patterns (grazing, nibbling, etc) which is distressing to me. I feel like I’m walking through mud and doing things like fixing my hair and putting on makeup irritate me to no end. And we won’t even discuss my behavior when I’m driving (it’s deplorable, fyi). 

A couple of things are contributing to my sad/mad state: my cycle is due to start any day now and I’m dealing with some seasonal allergies. I’ve noticed over the last year or so that when I get a mild allergy attack, I also get sad. Most of the time I’m tired anyway, but when allergies hit, I get really tired and sad and just become a most delightful version of myself. Does anyone else get this? And what’s weird, is that my allergies aren’t even very bad – they are very, very mild. A little bit of sneezing, a slightly runny nose, sometimes itchy eyes but that’s the extent of it. I could see if I was really having terrible symptoms that being tired and miserable would of course go right along with it, but it’s barely a blip on my allergy radar and my mood just sinks. What’s up with that? I took an allergy pill this morning so we’ll see if it helps. 

I’m also disappointed with myself because I love how I feel when I’m working out and eating well, but these last few days I just can’t seem to make myself behave that way (see: “walking through mud” above). I know that in a couple of days I’ll come out of this funk and all will be well again, but it’s hard to not feel shame and guilt while I’m going through it. 

Oh, and I think I lost my Withings pedometer. I wore a pair of pants that had shallow pockets and I think my pedometer fell out when I stopped to get a salad at a convenience store one day. I called the store but no one had turned it in and the website log doesn’t show any steps after that time, so I don’t know what happened to it. I’m going to go back to the store today and see if it’s anywhere around there. I hate it when I lose something and can’t find it. I still have my Fitbit One, so I might have to charge it up and use it for now. 

One bright spot is that I’m getting one of these:

It’s a sit-stand workstation for my desk at work!! One of the biggest drawbacks to my job is that I sit for 40 hours a week and we all have heard that sitting is the new smoking, so when the time came to discuss the budget for next year, I asked my regional manager if something like this was possible and he very surprisingly said yes. Then in a shocking turn of events, he said “if you need it now, go ahead and order it.” My jaw hit the floor. So I had it ordered the next day and it came yesterday!! Woohoo!! The only minor problem is that I can’t get it installed on my desk until next week – we have to make some minor modifications to my desk in order for it to work and we have Big Wig stuff going on this week, so no one will have time to help me with it until next week. It kills me not to be able to do it myself, but a) this thing is heavy and b) a small notch is going to have to be cut out of the thin metal back part of my desk and I’m not a welder and have never used a blow torch so…I’m going to be patient and wait (except I’m not patient at all and I want it done NOW but I have no choice). I’ll probably do a whole ‘nother post about this after we get it up and going in which I’ll give all the pertinent deets. 🙂 

So that’s my lovely life today. I hope you all are feeling well and happy and having a good day.