I took this quiz this morning and the result is that I am the Hulk, which pretty much sums up my mood for the last, oh I’d say, 6 months. Yes, most of the time I feel like a big green Rage Machine. It’s lovely to be me. I used to be full of optimism and light-heartedness, but now I feel snarky and judgy and basically unpleasant most of the time. I noticed yesterday in the parking lot of Walmart that I verbally abused (in my mind) an elderly gentleman for driving too slow. Then when I actually got in the store, the amount of snark I (again, silently) directed at the other shoppers was astonishing. I have turned into a very unpleasant person.
It just takes so much effort to be positive. I’m tired already…why does being pleasant have to be so hard? And when did this grumpy old woman take the place of the sweet young thing I used to be? And the real question is…can I get her back?
I need an app that will send me reminders to be nice and think nice thoughts. Is there such a thing? If not, there should be (Dear Smart People, get on this.)
And lest you think “hey Jill, I hear exercise increases those feel good endorphins”, well let me tell you that I HAVE been exercising. I’ve been doing walking intervals on the treadmill (I even ran a few intervals yesterday) so apparently all this snarkiness is me WITH endorphins – can you imagine the level of crank I’d be without all the exercising?! Scary!
My mood is probably due to a lot of things: allergies (there’s been a strong south wind blowing in which has brought warmer temperatures along with lots of other things that make one sneeze), ovulation, not enough quality sleep, and just the general Rat Race of Life. I’ve cleaned up my diet a lot, but over the weekend I got a little lazy with the grazing and I didn’t track any of my food (Hi Amanda* – lots for us to talk about today!) and I am now of course regretting it. All of these things have me in a less-than-sunshiney mood.
I don’t want to be the Angry Overweight Woman. I used to read a blogger who was SUPER snarky all the time and wore her bitchiness like a crown. After just a few weeks, I stopped reading her because who wants to fill their mind and spirit with that??? And yet I feel that I am in danger of becoming a woman with that same crown.
DANGER WILL ROBINSON, DANGER!!
I need a peace-loving hippie to follow me around and throw daisies at me so I’ll remember to be kind. Know anyone who would be interested?
*Amanda is my personal coach with Selvera. I’m sure we’ll have plenty to talk about on our weekly call this afternoon.