What I love (I mean really love – fills my heart with joy, satisfies my soul)

  • Words – written words, specifically. I love books and word games like nobody’s business.
  • antique stores – I love the feeling I get when I walk in. I love the smell of once-loved old things.
  • fresh flowers – the colors and scents make me happy
  • Women friends- being around other women and the empathy/camaraderie they bring makes me happy.
  • Nature – sadly this is the one I need to connect with more. I feel much more at peace when I am outside, yet I find 90% of my time is spent indoors. Maybe this is why I so often feel unsatisfied with life?

Being on vacation for 2 weeks and doing things outside of my usual routine has led to me feeling like I am missing something in my life. I want more…adventure? Maybe. Satisfaction? Definitely. Sitting behind a desk for 40 hours a week is not my bliss, I know that for sure. I feel like I need to start exploring what I would like to do if the day ever comes that I finally leave this job. I don’t want to leave this job only to find myself in the exact same situation. Same play, different actors isn’t going to cut it. I want something different for the second half of my life. The list above is just something I thought of doing to help me start looking.

On our vacation, the hubs asked if we wanted to try river rafting. I’ve never done it before and in the spirit of adventure, I said “let’s do it”. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. I loved every aspect of it – the lazy floating, the furious paddling, going through the rapids (although the rapids were wienie-rapids because the water level was way down) and coming out victorious on the other side…it was all good. Our guide was a 40-something woman named Sunny who I decided I would like to be when I grow up. She was amazing. She does 3 float trips every day and then after rafting season is over, she is a hunting guide for 2 different camps – one for bear and one for deer. Her dream is to be a fishing guide some day. And I have no doubt that she will be one day. Oh and she’s thin, with long dark hair and a sweet disposition – not the rough and rowdy type you might be picturing (I don’t know what that has to do with anything, but it felt important to point that out). Doing the river rafting and meeting Sunny made me realize that there is so much more to life than processing work orders and doing laundry.

I want to spend some time experimenting and trying to find what it is that makes me supremely happy and START DOING IT. Let someone else sit behind the desk and process work orders for a change.