I’m actually going to post this one

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I have about 4 or 5 half finished posts in my drafts that I almost accidentally published but then I deleted so if you read me in a Reader then you come over here and there aren’t any posts that is why.

You’re welcome for that incredibly long yet makes no sense sentence. Much like that sentence.

Sheesh.

ANYWAY,  I gathered you all here today to let you know that time is slipping away my friends. In case you didn’t know it already.

My kids end their school year next Tuesday  and I’m suddenly VERY AWARE of how time seems to be zooming away at the speed of light. I am handling this fact as maturely and gracefully as you would imagine, which is to say, not handling it well at all.

My oldest will be in 10th grade in the fall, and when I was in school 10th grade started high school (junior high was 7th, 8th, & 9th grade). At my kids school now, they have a Mid High which is 9th & 10th, and High School is 11th & 12th. But in my mind, 10th grade = high school.

Here’s how I am on the outside to anyone who asks about him:

Oh yeah he’ll be in 10th grade next year. He’s going to take Driver’s Ed in the fall and he still loves marching band. We’re looking at which colleges he might go to or what route he might take after high school. It’s all good.

Here’s how I am on the inside while appearing calm and cool:

MY BABY IS TOO YOUNG TO BE IN BIG SCHOOL WITH THOSE BIG KIDS AND HE’S TOO YOUNG TO DRIVE AND HE’S TOO YOUNG TO BE HUGGING THAT GIRL AND WHY GOD WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LET HIM GROW UP SO SOON?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Freaking the heck OUT is what I’m doing.

Also, my middle one will be entering middle school in the fall and I’m a wee bit sad that she won’t be in elementary school anymore. More than that, I sort of dread the middle school girl drama that she will most likely have to endure. Some of it has begun already, but if memory serves me correctly, it tends to get worse in grades 6th – 8th.

Seriously, if I could go back and freeze a specific time, I would freeze the year my kids were 11, 7, and 3 and keep it there forever. FOR.EV.ER.

I’m so thankful that I still have a child in the elementary school – she’ll enter 2nd grade next school year and you better believe I’m going to milk every minute of her grade school time.  Poor thing, she’s going to be surprised to find that her shadow is actually me.

And do you all know what I do when I’m dealing with unpleasantness? I’ll give you ten guesses…and I’ll give you ten hints:

1 – 10) EAT!

I’m trying guys, I really am. I’m trying to not eat my feelings but it is so, so  hard. I’ve done really well today, and I’m hoping that by getting it all out here, I won’t feel so inclined to stuff the feelings down with food.

My nest is not empty but my first baby bird will be leaving too soon. How do all you other mama birds deal with this? and will it be traumatic for my son if I go to school with him every day for the next 3 years? I don’t think so. He’ll learn to deal with it.  😉

 

 

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7 thoughts on “I’m actually going to post this one

  1. myjourneytofit

    I swear, I cried at least once a week for my oldest son’s entire senior year. And then he left for college, and I cried some more. Not gonna lie – it WAS weird to go from a family of 4 to a family of 3. I know that this is supposed to happen, but it sure sneaks up on you, right? No good advice – but you’ll get through it. Enjoy these last few years with him, and of course, there’s always summer vacation and the long break between semesters – he’ll be back! 🙂

  2. Erm… I eat too. I’ve been eating. I haven’t been able to lose weight since October. I get it, and you have my total sympathy. My high school started at 10th grade, but my daughter’s starts at 9th. She’s starting high school in the Fall, and I’m so amazed at what a wonderful woman she is becoming, and flat out terrified and sad over it too. *sigh*

    I’m there with ya. *hugs*

    I think dealing with it is maybe about making positive plans about the future? Driving around and looking at those colleges? Shopping dates with conversations that REALLY hold your attention (that girl drama is good for THAT at least.) Etc…?

  3. debby

    I don’t have kids, but I sure know how fast time flies, so I can only imagine… This “will it be traumatic for my son if I go to school with him every day for the next 3 years?” made me LOLOL.

  4. Angie

    My oldest is graduating from college (and on to Grad School), my middle is entering 7th grade and my youngest is entering 2nd grade. I HEAR YOU SISTA LOUD AND CLEAR!!!

  5. I can’t really relate since I don’t have children, so I just wanted to say that your boy is the cutest, and from what you write about him – he sounds like a gem!

  6. I’m there, too. I’m happy it’s Spring, but with it comes the realization that my kids just finished another year of school (and I STILL haven’t cleared away all the school papers from.the.year.before).

    My 6 y.o. fell asleep on my lap tonight. I mourned for all of them growing too fast. It’s probably too weird to snuggle with my oldest son. I can barely get a hug out of him.

    Yeah, it gets to me.

    I was reading MyJourneyToFit’s comment about going from 4 to 3. That triggered a memory of my friend who has 11 children. She commented how empty the house felt with only 6!

    I want to shout at my kids to stop growing, too, until Mommy can get it all together and figure out how to do this mothering thing and be a good example and stay calm and all the other high-hopes I envisioned I’d be capable of when the tiny peanuts were brought to me bundled in hospital-issued blankets and caps.

    (Whaaaaaaaaa) — that’s me crying, not the peanuts

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