If you’ve spent any length of time around the weight loss blogosphere, I’m sure you’ve heard that it’s important to make peace with your body, and I believe that 100%. For me, it was a huge revelation to understand that my body is not the enemy. My body does some pretty amazing stuff and I try to remember that when I’m having trouble zipping up last year’s pants.
But I’ve also recently come to realize that I have to make peace with something else. Something I used to kick and scream against, something I used to white knuckle my way through until I was left a sobbing mess in the corner.
I realize now that I have to make peace with the weight loss process.
I have started doing that, and I believe this is going to be the thing that eventually gets me to my goal. I am realizing that it doesn’t have to be so soul-crushingly difficult to just eat a little less and move more. In the past, I used to fight so hard to lose weight without really changing anything. Or I felt like I had to change EVERYTHING and I just couldn’t do it, so I would settle comfortably back in my old rut. Counting calories or points was so crazy-making because it’s hard to stay within your allotted range when all you are eating is Oreos and Cheetos. And when you refuse to go any faster than 2.5 miles on the treadmill, it’s pretty hard to burn any fat. Now though, I realize that I can make changes that feel good to me. I’ve discovered that pushing myself to go faster on the treadmill feels good, and cherry tomatoes and Laughing Cow cheese make an excellent snack in the afternoon. I’m sort of just going with the flow and being honest with myself about how I feel.
And really, I have no idea how I started making the shift from I MUST LOSE WEIGHT NOW, to I’m just going to do the best I can at this weight loss thing. Well that’s not exactly true, I do have a couple of ideas of what has helped: Listening to the Untangled sessions has helped with some of the inside stuff, reading MB’s blog has helped me realize that sometimes slow and steady is the only way to get there, and also tracking my calories in a less Nazi-like fashion has been helpful too. Instead of telling myself I must not eat more than 1200 calories per day, I tell myself to just stay under 1800 calories. Most of the time I come in around or under 1400 calories and that totally works for me.
After 13 years of trying to lose weight, trying diet after diet, pills, shakes, supplements, etc etc etc…I
have finally come to understand am starting to understand that there is no magic solution. There is no trick or secret to losing weight. The solution is so crazily obvious I didn’t want to see it (hello Forest, meet Trees). The solution, I have slowly and painfully come to realize, is ME. I am the solution to my weight loss problems. I have everything I need to do this. Buying cute workout clothes will not guarantee that I will work out. Having a gym membership will not guarantee that I will go. Having lots of workout dvds does not mean that I will actually use them. The only thing I really and truly need is ME. Do the accouterments of weight loss help? Sure, if you use them. I love the Calorie Count website, my treadmill, and my Facebook group (we’re up to 13 members – woo!) and they all help me do what I need to do to get the weight off, but they don’t do it FOR me.
I still have a long way to go, but for right now, today, I’m okay with that. As long as I am going in the right direction, I’ll get there eventually.