BuhBye Funkytown, hello body image talk

I’m feeling much better today. I drank 6 glasses of water yesterday, which is lower than my planned goal, but also more than I had been drinking over the weekend, plus I got in 23 minutes on the elliptical last night. Woohoo!! I really needed that cardio last night, and I was bound and determined that I would NOT bring Jillian into the picture, so I got in as many minutes on the elliptical as I could and I claimed those 23 minutes as a Small Personal Victory.  Yay!

This was me after my workout!

Those crazy folks over at iChange are doing some experimenting and I offered to be a lab rat.  They are letting me have my own group on iChange!!  I’ll get more details later, but in a couple of weeks you can join me on iChange and I will hold your hand and help you get a jump start on eating better/losing weight.  It’s a simple program, but it will be tons of fun – so keep it in mind and when I know more, I’ll let you know more.  🙂

My kitchen is 90% finished – we just have to do tile the kitchen floor. I had planned on showing you all pictures on Monday, but “the funk that would not die” kind of overtook anything I wanted to do. I’ll get my kitchen tidied up and take some pics and hopefully post them on Friday. Hopefully.

 We had a good discussion on the iChange forums yesterday about body image (started by me). I don’t know why, but it amazes me that we as women are still so hard on ourselves.  It’s taken me 3 years of exploring and trial and error, but I finally feel like I’m mostly over my body-hate.  Sure, there are still days when I wish I had Cindy Crawford’s legs, but really, I’m fine with what I’ve got. I think it’s because now I’m working from a place of health and strength, and not so much from vanity.  I’ve still got 20 pounds to go, and I might decide once I get there, that I want to go for another 10 (I doubt it, but who knows?), but if I didn’t lose another pound, I think I’d be okay as long as I was building up and toning up my muscles. Maybe it’s just a part of getting older, but whatever it is, it’s a nice place to be. I spent WAY too much time bashing my body and filling my head and heart with thoughts of self-hatred.  I just don’t have the time or the energy to do that anymore, and I’m much happier for it. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t just flip a switch and turn all the negative thoughts off – it took me a long time to get to this place. I took an online course about emotional eating (Shrinkyourself.com) that really turned on some lightbulbs for me. Then I started dabbling in Intuitive Eating and reading Body Image blogs – although I personally don’t think IE is a viable way to lose weight, the IE blogs and community really helped me see that I am more than my weight. Then when I started this blog, and people started reading and actually commenting (!), I saw myself through their eyes – I was funny, I was insightful, I was real, all things that I hadn’t been for many, many years. The more I wrote, the more I realized that I have so much more to offer this world than just my looks (which are pretty average if you ask me). Then I started reading running blogs and realized that there are a whole group of people who exercise FOR THE ENJOYMENT OF IT. That was contrary to everything I believed about working out, but I kept reading and I realized the tremendous health benefits of exercising and eating well.  Slowly but surely, I have come to a place where I see how it all fits together. If I eat well, and move my body, I feel better about myself, which in turn makes me not so dependant on food to heal my wounds, which makes losing weight so much easier, which then makes moving my body easier, etc etc etc.  See how it all works?  Isn’t it awesome?!

So if you are one of those who still struggles with a bad body image, do something about it! You don’t have to live with these thoughts – they are not who you are.  Do some research – read books, read blogs, talk to other women whom you admire – and start to heal yourself.  If you need professional counseling, then by all means, GO!  Do whatever you have to do to be satisfied with yourself.

Okay, I’m going to get off my soapbox now, but really, this is something I wish I could make every woman understand – YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN YOUR WEIGHT.  How many of you still struggle with body image, and do you think it gets easier or harder as you get older? Chime in and tell me your story!  🙂

7 thoughts on “BuhBye Funkytown, hello body image talk

  1. This might be long…guaranteed.
    First off, your blog is one of the very first ones that I found when I ventured out into the blog reading world. Something I didn’t do for the first year of blogging. When I started reading you, I actually groaned and thought that I would never be as good as you are. After I started reading more blogs, I realized that there are some really sucky blogs out there, and I stopped comparing myself, and concluded that we all have something to contribute. You contribute a lot. Thank you.
    As far as body image…crap. Monday I escaped with my daughter to get pedicures and we talked a lot about this. I worry that my own body image is screwing hers up. Which sucks. I’ve always made an effort to pad my kids egos, with honesty. Every once in a while my daughter will say “I think I have pretty eyes” or “I love the fact that my legs are long” and when she says those things I realize maybe I haven’t totally corrupted her. When she quit dance a couple years back she lost some of the “lean” that she had (she also hit puberty) so I think it was a double donkey punch for her. She looks amazing though, but she compares herself to girls at school…which as we all know is hard not to do. BUT, and this is where you might question my parenting skills, I told her a while back when she was lamenting her “booty” that she had a body that makes grown men cry. She’s not interested in grown men…but a few weeks ago she came in and said “Look and my booty. It rocks.” Oh dear…time to polish up my shooting skills.
    Once upon a time we became mothers and looked at our bodies as permanent markers of where we’ve been, the stretch marks, the belly, the boobs that became foreign objects. Now we see these celebrities, and six weeks after having a c-section, these chicks are skinny again. Forget the fact that these people have nannies, and personal trainers, people who cook for them…we see the photos. It’s hard not to compare.
    We are more than our looks, but unfortunately IQ is not visible across the room. Confidence is however.
    Yes, it gets so much harder as you get older…old habits die very hard.
    I would really be interested in your group. Thanks for addressing this issue. (and thanks for the links)

    1. Aw, Heather you’re making me get all misty!! Thanks for the blog-love.
      I think you are doing a fine job of talking to your daughter – when she says things like that – I think that’s a definite success!! Mine is 9 years old and one time she said something to the effect of “I weigh a lot” – at which point I looked her in the eye and I said “don’t even go there – you are perfect – you weigh exactly what you should weigh for your age – and that’s all that matters”. I try really hard to be careful what I say about my own body – when she sees me working out, I tell her it’s because I want to be as healthy as I can be, and that I don’t get to have recess at work (why not? We should ALL get recess!) so I have to do my recess on the elliptical. It’s so hard to know what to say and what not to say to her!! Good gravy, I could do a whole post on this one subject!!

  2. Whoa, Jillie, you can change gears fast enough to make my head spin! GREAT post. And I know you won’t believe me, but I started a blog post this morning on body image. Great minds….

  3. I’m so happy to see someone got some exercise in today. I on the other hand spent a freakin hour and a half sitting in the doctors office waiting patiently for someone to come in and check out my freakin hives. When I could have been at the gym and then eating my hummy lunch I brought. But No I had to waste it sitting in a stupid dr office. I am so jealous.

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