I’ve been re-reading some of my old posts and it hit me today, just how far I have come. I’ve been writing this blog for almost two years now, and wow – my thinking has shifted more than I realized. I originally started this blog for accountability and for a place to just get stuff out of my head; little did I know it would transform me into a different, better person. The physical change has not been so drastic, but what’s going on inside is dramatically different.

Here’s a brief snap shot of how Jill’07 thought:

• I hate to sweat

• Exercise is torture

• I don’t want to give up my junk food

• I’m such a failure because I can’t lose 5 pounds

• I’m so fat

• I want what I want when I want it (which is right now, btw)

• I’m lonely

• I have no self esteem

• My life generally sucks

Yeah, she was real fun person to be around!! The changes have been gradual and I hadn’t even really realized some of them until I started reading the old posts and thinking about it, but here’s what Jill’09 thinks now:

I love to get a good sweat on

• My favorite time of day is when I can put on the mp3 player and zone out on my elliptical

• I’m snacking on grape tomatoes and cantaloupe and I love it!

• Too much junk food makes me ill.

• If I haven’t lost 5 pounds, it’s because what I’m currently doing isn’t working for me – NOT because I am a failure at anything.

• I’m curvy and I hold a lot of my weight in my lower half – I say that not as a criticism, it’s just a fact and no matter how thin I get, that’s how it’s always going to be. That’s how God made me and I’m fine with that.

• I still want what I want when I want it, but I know that if I keep working hard; eventually “it” will come to me (whatever it may be).

• I have a bunch of blog friends, and I’m making more friends IRL as well. If I’m feeling lonely it’s because I haven’t reached out and made the effort.

• I have waaaayyyy more self esteem and confidence now than I’ve had for the last 12 years, and weight loss has contributed only a small part to that.

• My life is actually pretty okay. God has blessed me way more than I deserve.

I’m glad I did a little reflecting today because it let me know that the small gradual changes can make a huge difference, and I’m also encouraged by the changes I have yet to make. If I keep blogging and reading your blogs and learning more about health and fitness, the changes will keep coming and they’ll be changes for the better I’m sure.

I’d like to keep going and analyze the route of my journey, but alas, I’m running out of time today to delve that deeply. I’ll have to save that for another day. I hope that as you go about your day, you’ll think about all the positive changes you have made and give yourselves a pat on the back. Celebrate yourself and the positive changes!

Happy Weekend ya’ll!