SPLIT PERSONALITY

 

Since I have lost weight this year and have been extra mindful (most days) of what I eat, I have developed a split personality.  The first personality, and the one who has ruled my life for the last 37. 5 years, is named Habit.  Habit is the one who takes over when I’m tired or when I’ve had a bad day.  If there is a plate of cookies on the counter, Habit will absentmindedly reach for one (or six) and blissfully consume those cookies without a thought, because a)they’re there and b)they’re cookies.  However, since about June or July, a new personality has emerged and her name is Fortitude.  Fortitude is the one who stops me and says “you don’t really want that, you’re just doing it out of Habit”.  She’s also the voice that I hear (yeah, I hear voices, don’t you?) when I really want to watch Oprah in the afternoons, but I know I need to get on the treadmill instead.  Fortitude is matter of fact, no nonsense, and knows how to get the job done.  Sometimes Habit and Fortitude argue back and forth like insolent siblings.  For example, this is part of the conversation they had last Friday afternoon:

 

Habit:  Ooooh, mini-donuts!!  I need some!!

 

Fortitude:  No you don’t.  You’re not even hungry.

 

Habit:  But they’re mini-donuts.  Who can resist a mini-donut?

 

Fortitude:  You can.  You don’t want them really, it’s just a knee-jerk reaction to reach for them. 

 

Habit:  But I love them.  And they look so fresh and inviting.

               

Fortitude:  Think about eating one – I guarantee it won’t taste as good as you hope it will.  You aren’t hungry, and you don’t even really want one – I promise.  Just let it go.

 

Habit:  This is hard, but maybe you’re right.  What if I just eat one, just to make sure…

               

Fortitude:  (loudly) BACK AWAY FROM THE DONUTS MA’AM.  YOU DON’T WANT THE DONUTS!!

 

Habit:  Damn.  Stupid Fortitude, always wrecking my party. 

 

Fortitude:  Yeah, but without me, you wouldn’t be wearing smaller jeans.  So there.

 

 

So Fortitude won that battle, but I’m sad to say that Habit got her way yesterday when faced with a lazy Sunday afternoon and a bag of Cheetos and Double Stuff Oreos.  But it’s all good because Fortitude is gonna kick Habit’s tail on the treadmill this afternoon (it has to be this afternoon, because Habit is kicking Fortitude’s tail in the mornings – just can’t seem to do the morning workout lately).   

 

THE KITTY PICS

 

Here are pics of lil Smokey, the newest member of the family.  He’s kind of a pain, but oh so cute!