About these ads

A 40-something woman trying to lose 40-something pounds

Monthly Archives: May 2009

A couple of months ago, I got an email from a nice man named Neil asking me if I could spread the word about his wife’s new book enLIGHTened.  He mentioned that her previous book about miscarriage had fallen through the cracks and they didn’t want that to happen to this book.  I had a miscarriage about 10 years ago, so I had a soft spot for Neil and his wife Jessica almost immediately.  They sent me a copy of the book and I read it and have been working on my review for a while because I want to do this book justice. This is not your typical “I lost weight, so you can too!” kind of book; it’s a story about a girl who found her passion and embraced it. 

 

 

Jessica Berger Gross’ passion is yoga, and even though yoga seemed to come naturally to her, she still struggled with her body and body image. The full title of her book is enLIGHTened: How I Lost 40 Pounds With a Yoga Mat, Fresh Pineapples, and a Beagle-Pointer.  Her other passion is pineapples and one of her biggest supporters is her dog Salem (the beagle-pointer mentioned in the title). 

This is a very honest account of someone who not only lost weight, but finally found herself amidst a lot of struggle and family strife. She doesn’t sugar-coat anything – she’s been through some heartache and freely shares her struggles. She admits that trying to do some of the poses while overweight was challenging at best, and darn near impossible at worst.  Her journey to finding peace with her body took her from Long Island to a mountain top in Katmandu and back again. The book is filled with humor and a touch of sarcasm from time to time (a woman after my own heart!).  One of my favorite lines in the book is in a chart with the heading Top Six Signs You Are Eating Too Much.  The first one (and my fave) is:

“Your “fat” clothes have become your favorite clothes. Stretchy is the new black!”

Not only has Jessica embraced yoga, but the yogic lifestyle as well.  I’ll admit there were points in the book where I thought, “oh no, she’s going to get all woo-woo on me here” but then she pulls out a phrase or experience that makes me laugh and I realized she’s a regular woman like the rest of us. For example, she talks about doing a juice fast at a Kripalu retreat and being asked by the instructor what she wants out of the next sip of her juice. She says,

“I wanted to be comforted, I wanted to be filled. (To be honest, I wanted a grilled cheese sandwich.)” 

Amen sister! Me too!

In addition to her yoga practice, she also incorporated some ideas to make her weight loss success a little easier,  such as keeping a big bowl of fruit available in the fridge at all times (preferably pineapple!), getting an accountability partner to whom you are extremely honest, having a few staple meals that you can go-to in a crunch(veggie chili anyone?), and developing discipline (also known as tapas in the yogic community) to help you in not only weight loss, but life in general as well. These are just a few of the things Jessica had to learn to fit into her busy life as a wife, mom, yoga teacher, and writer, so if she can do it I think we can too.

The book is light hearted at times and painfully real at others, but always honest. She’s honest about her once very large appetite, the strife with her parents, the dark days that sent her into a depression. The only time she felt free and unburdened was while she was doing her yoga or meditating with a warm beagle-pointer on her lap. Through yoga and lots and lots of pinepple, she transformed herself from a chubby depressed teenager to a lithe and serene (on most days) woman. 

Not only did Jessica’s story touch my heart, but there were a couple of ideas stuck with me after I finished reading the book.  In another chart ( I loved the charts) she writes something that made a lightbulb go on in my head: 

“Food should leave you energetic, not sleepy.” 

Whoa. I was suprised at how surprised I was that this suprised me so.   You mean I’m NOT supposed to stuff myself silly and then fall into a food coma every night after dinner?  I’ve been working on incorporating this one into my daily life – and I could write a big post about just this concept alone, but this  isn’t about me, so I’ll save it for another day. :)

Another quote that hasn’t left my mind is about being active. Even though Jessica is a firm believer in the power of yoga, she is smart enough to know that not everyone will be a yogi, but everyone can find something that gets them moving. She says,

“We each need to find our own yoga, the physical work that keeps us healthy and strong.” 

Everyone needs to move, and it helps if you can be passionate about moving in some way or another. So even if you don’t run out and buy a yoga mat, at least take some time to think about what your yoga could be. 

At the end of this book, I just wanted to hug Jessica and her husband Neil.   In honor of her book, I did a little yoga and bought some pineapple and have been trying to take some time to discover my passion.  If you do yoga, or have been thinking of giving it a try, I highly recommend reading this book.  She gives an illustration of poses at the start of each chapter, so even if your dog has never been downward-facing, you can still try the poses in the book.

I’m really glad I took the time to read (and re-read) this book, and I think you will enjoy it too.  If any of you yoga-types out there really really REALLY want this book, leave me a comment and let me know. If more than one of you really want the book, I’ll draw names and send the winner my review copy of the book.  The book itself is in great shape, the jacket cover however is just a tad bit worn – this book has traveled from my bedroom to the living room to my office and back again, but it still looks good. 

*Don’t you love this phrase?  This is the title of one of the chapters in the book – I think it sums up the the whole book nicely!  :)

About these ads

So Shawn and I had this great idea that we would put in a vegetable garden this year. We’ve done a few tomato plants in the past, but we were feeling ambitious and decided to do the whole shebang.  Shawn got an area in our back yard ready by tilling and then retilling the clay soil and getting it good and prepped. 

And then we ignored it for a month.

So then we had to till it AGAIN but this time we did not ignore it.  There was a lot of grass in it, so guess who got to rake the grass out? Me, that’s who.  Have you ever raked a garden before? It’s not the same as raking the light, dry leaves of fall, oh hell no. You have to break up the clumps and then pick up the grass and throw them far enough so they don’t land in another part of the plot. It was hard, sweaty, red-faced, I-think-I’m-going-to-pass-out work. I raked, and then I had to get the hoe (snicker snicker) and break up the harder clumps of grass and dirt, and then I had to pick up the rocks, and then I got to run the big gas tiller – excellent bicep workout by the way – while Shawn raked some more.  It was very difficult, but really gratifying…

…until the next morning. Holy cow guys, even the muscles in my hands were sore!  The muscles in my back, my hamstrings, my chest – all sore, but in a really good I-did-something-productive kind of way. 

We planted tomatoes, corn, carrots, peppers, squash, okra, and cantaloupe.  Surely out of all that, something will grow. I hope.

First knitting, now gardening?  Who is this strange new person inhabiting my body?

martha-stewart

Oh, well, I guess that explains the raging mood swings too.


How To Burn 4.3 Million Calories in 4 Short Hours

Step 1)  Plant a garden.

The End.

Hey – did you like how I complained about how bloggers aren’t blogging much these days and then I disappear for several days myself?!  I know, I’m a hypocrite, but I’m back for just a minute to say hi!

I had a great weekend and will blog about it later but right now I am super swamped at work, so unfortunately I can’t stay and play.  :(       I will try my hardest to  post tonight about my New Garden Workout – it’s a killer!

 

ETA: I can’t believe no one called me out on the misspelling of the word in the title. I have no idea why I spelled it with a K. I’m really not an idiot. I promise.


Is it just me or do the ‘nets seem awfully quiet lately? Lots of bloggers that I read regularly have slowed way down on their blogging activity, haven’t blogged in months, or have deleted their blogs entirely (WhiteFlower, I’m looking at you).  What happened? Did everyone suddenly get a life and didn’t tell me or have they just run out of things to say? Is this just a cycle of the blogosphere – old blogs die, new ones crop up to take their places? (Cue Circle of Life song here) Whatever it is, it makes me a little sad, that’s all I’m saying.

Oh well, never fear! I haven’t run out of things to say yet, so for the two of you still reading this blog, here’s the latest musings from the Pear:

I did yoga tonight!!  I’ve always had a little far away crush on yoga but never had the nerve to go up and talk to it.  Last weekend I downloaded a 30 minute Yoga For Weight Loss routine and this afternoon the house was finally quiet enough (ie the kids were outside playing) and so I got brave, batted my eyelashes, and asked yoga out on a date!  It was really fun and a great work out – I was dripping with sweat not even half way through.  The pace goes a little fast, but the moves are fairly repetitive so I think that in a couple more workouts I’ll be flowing right along with the instructor.  This is definitely something I’ll try to add to my workout arsenal.

I’m taking a knitting class Saturday morning! I’m really excited and the best part is that it is right here in my lil bitty hometown. The best best part is that it is right around the corner from my house! No kidding!  There is this quaint little farm not far from where I live where they have sheep shearing and a pumpkin patch and a little gift shop. They teach all kinds of fabric crafts, so when I found out they offer knitting classes, I signed my daughter and myself up for Saturday morning.  I think Sarah (my 8 year old) needs a hobby – she’s constantly saying she’s bored, and she fills the time by eating.  Sounds hauntingly familiar, no? 

Another fun thing I’m looking forward to is meeting a friend of mine who I haven’t seen in about 20 years.  I found T on Facebook and found out she lives in Tulsa, so we are going to meet up and have dinner at my favorite seafood place.  I can’t wait!

I’m making baked chicken breasts, brown rice and asparagus-blend veggies for dinner tonight – it already smells super yummy. I’m planning on working out on the elliptical tonight as well as finish my upcoming book review, so if I”m going to get all that done before midnight, I’d better get to it.  Have a nice night y’all.


So, I had a revelation this morning. I was browsing the forums on Calorie Count and the question was posed: “How do you reward yourself for your weight loss efforts?” There were a lot of the same answers – massage, new clothes, mani/pedi, etc, but there were also some really different ideas too, such as the woman who pays her 10 year old daughter to keep her on track with work outs. She pays her daughter $10 a week to remind her to work out 5 days a week and track her cals 5 days a week. Other people said their reward was knowing that they did a certain number of work outs in a week and still others didn’t use any rewards at all. A few people said they base their rewards on the number of times they worked out, instead of on the number of pounds lost, which I thought was really smart. You can check out the whole thing here.

A reward system doesn’t really work for me, especially if it involves the spending of money. I’m a cheap frugal gal and usually by the time I have earned a reward, I don’t want to spend the money to get it. One time I set up an elaborate goal/reward system for myself that included a reward for every 5 pounds lost. I never did reach that first 5 pounds so I never got ANY of the rewards I promised myself. Dangling a bracelet in front of my face for losing weight just doesn’t seem to motivate me to get off my duff or to put down that cookie.

So what does motivate me? How did I lose 30 pounds last year? And what was that revelation I had this morning?

Thanks for asking! I’ll tell you.

As I was pondering the reward/motivation question, I realized that I am most motivated by fear of disappointment.

Wha????

No really, last year when I lost weight it wasn’t because of the appetite suppressant or the daily walking – it was because I didn’t want to disappoint the Nurse Nazi or the doctor who so very generously gave me a deep discount on the program. I worked hard because I didn’t want them to be disappointed in me. And along those same lines, I worked out 4 times last week and did push ups and crunches because I didn’t want to disappoint MizFit since I am on her team for the Woman Challenge. I don’t want to be the team member who doesn’t pull her weight (hehe) during this challenge.

I know some of you will say, “what about disappointing yourself, Jill? You don’t want to disappoint yourself do you?” to which I say “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!” I’ve disappointed myself so many times that I’m immune to my own disappointment of me (okay that was very bad grammar, but you get the point). Fear of disappointing myself is no fear at all; it’s a way of life. Yeah I know, I need therapy, but that’s what I’ve got this blog for right?!

The Woman Challenge lasts for another 7 weeks so I hope that I can keep the momentum going. I’ll have to come up with someone else to NOT disappoint after that. I need to exploit this fear to its fullest potential.

If only Jon Bon Jovi would issue a challenge to me, I’d be golden. ;)

 

If you lose 20 pounds, I'll write you a song, Jill.


I did an email interview with Vanessa over at the DietBoard  last week, so if you want to see just how boring I can be, head on over there and check me out!  Here the linkage:  http://www.dietboard.net/interview-with-jill-author-of-the-sassy-pear-152.html

She asked me some really good questions, and they really made me think about where I’ve been and where I’m going in my weight loss journey.  So while you are reading the questions she asked me, think about how you would answer them (as much as they pertain to your situation), and come back here and let me know if you had any insights into your own journey. 

Happy Monday gang!


Have you ever been so mad that you didn’t want to eat? Me either, until last night that is. Shawn apparently felt like taking his life into his own hands and said something very stupid about how the laundry was really piling up and how the messy the house was. Yeah, I know, right?!  He obviously did not think that one through before speaking those words. I won’t rehash the argument here, but let’s just say that many a dagger was thrown from my eyes.

When I’m mad, I am the Queen of the Silent Treatment. I can go cold shoulder in 2.2 seconds flat and stay that way as long as necessary. I know, probably  not the most healthy way to argue (or not argue, as the case may be), but it has served me well these last 38 years so I use it whenever I have to.  Needless to say, I was seething with anger so I thought to myself, “I’ll show him! I’ll do every scrap of laundry in this house and I will clean every room within an inch of its life! He will never be able to bitch about the dusty state of this house ever again EVER!”  Okay, looking back now, I see that I gave him exactly what he wanted, but instead of happy-go-lucky slob, he had to deal with Neat Freak Bitch for the rest of the night, and it was not pretty. 

 

I know there was a point to this story somewhere…what was it? Oh yeah, now I remember!

 

The argument happened right after I got home from work, so I hadn’t had a snack or dinner, but my hunger vanished the minute he uttered those fatally insensitive words.  My adrenaline was pumping so hard and fast that in 3.5 hours my incredibly slightly messy bedroom sparkled, and I did so much laundry that I ran out of hangers. 

And dammit if I didn’t learn a couple of lessons here!  One is that  I don’t have to have six different snacks after work to survive, and the second is  that when I am really serious (and really mad) and put my mind to something, I can accomplish the seemingly impossible. Kind of ties in to that whole “realizing my potential” thing I blogged about yesterday, huh?  I think the universe is trying to tell me something, like “get off your duff and start making some changes in your life! Girl, how many more hints do you need?”

Shawn called me at work today and apologized for unleashing the Kraken last night and promised to take me out on the town tomorrow night, so it’s all good.  He promised to not bitch so much and I promised to not be such a slob.  It’s all about compromise, ya know.

Well, I’m off to try something new – I just downloaded “Yoga for Weight Loss” off of yogadownload.com.  I have a couple of their other downloads and I really like them, so I’m excited to give this one a try.

Have a good weekend gang!!


I ate a lot of cheese today. When I say I ate a lot of cheese today, what I really mean is I ATE A LOT OF CHEESE TODAY. I’ve never been good at eyeballing 1 oz of cheese, so I think I probably had 4 oz actually. It was mozzarella and it tasted really good with my apple, and it wasn’t a cookie or a piece of cake, so I’m going to call it good, cause that’s how I roll.

I may be pursuing another job soon. There’s nothing wrong with my current job, but it has recently come to my attention that I may not be realizing my full earning potential. I was lamenting to my sister the other day about how frustrated I get sometimes with work and she said, “I know you can find another job. You won’t have any trouble finding another job.” So I started looking around for jobs in my field and lo and behold, there are a few jobs out there that pay substantially better than what I make now, doing roughly the same type of work. When I re-entered the work force 2 ½ years ago, I really never thought I could do any better than $10/hour. My degree is unusual and I had only a couple years of experience, but I some how managed to luck into a job whose decent salary makes it worth going to work every day. And I thought that this position would be the best that I could hope for, but now that I know that I have the potential to make more, I’m going for it. I know that I can do the work and I am worth a higher salary – I just had to realize that I was worth it. All this thinking about my earning potential made me start thinking that maybe I have the potential to finally lose these 30 extra pounds of baby weight I have been carrying around for the last 12 years (note to self: I don’t think you can call it baby weight when that “baby” turns 12). Maybe I do have the potential to work out hard and make the tough choices when it comes to food.  But realizing that I can do it is often harder than the actual doing. Maybe I never believed that I could really do it. I’m still not sure I 100% believe that I can lose all of it, but I’m certainly going to explore this further. I think that this has been the thing that keeps me from going all the way and really working hard to lose the rest of the weight – I think I have been holding myself back, not really believing that I have great potential. I just need to learn to follow through on that and make it a reality.

So what’s holding you back? What is it that keeps you from going to full nine yards and making it happen? (“It” can be anything; it doesn’t have to be weight loss.)


Howdy folks!

*Warning – TBL spoiler here. If you haven’t heard who the winner is, don’t read this post!

Feeling a little ornery today so let’s get right to the griping portion of the blog, shall we?

The Biggest Loser: I do not like Helen. I really wanted to Tara or Mike to win, but Helen? She was so damn smug the whole evening it just made me ill. I only started watching a few weeks ago, but I saw enough to know that Tara or Mike deserved the win more than Helen. And Jerry? I seriously thought he was like, 83 or something – he looked way older than his 63 years. All in all, I was thoroughly disappointed with the finale.

American Idol: Okay, I don’t know what show the judges were watching, but Adam is terrible! He screams more than he sings and his cocky attitude is such a turn off. Don’t get me wrong, I think the boy’s got talent and he could be super cute if he wasn’t such a freak, but really I have not been impressed by him at all. And it pisses me off that he’s most likely going to be one of the two finalists, because I adore Danny and Kris. I thought Danny’s and Kris’ ballads were both REALLY good – Adam not so much.

In other cranky-old-man news, I spilled coffee all over my lap this morning. I’m not so much mad at the big huge brownish stain all over my jeans as I am that I have been deprived of half a cup of coffee this morning!! I need my two full cups to feel human.

I’ve discovered the secret to not obsessing about food and/or calories: don’t think about it! I have put no thought into my food this week and I gotta say, it’s been pretty nice. I told Laura this morning that I’m really just trying to focus on getting my exercise groove back and the food part can wait a few days. It gets so tiring trying to do both things equally well at the same time, so I’m going to take a step back (or several steps really) and make very small attainable goals for the next few weeks. I need to get some momentum going on the work out front and then I’ll focus more on the food. I just do not have the energy or motivation right now to tackle them both.

I’ve still got the reunion dangling in front of my face and I really really really wish I didn’t have the added pressure of this event staring me in the face. I think it would be so much easier to focus on losing weight if I didn’t feel like I have only 2 months to do it. I’m seriously considering skipping the reunion because I don’t think anyone I hung out with in high school is going. I was really excited at first, but now…eh, not so much. I don’t know. I’ll decide later.

There is a fly buzzing my head. He’s been taunting me and playing games with me all morning long and I’m sorry to report that he is going to die. Very, very soon.

In other annoying news, I just ate my last pistachio.

Dammit.


Hey gang!

How was your weekend?

I had a good weekend. I think I cooked once all weekend long – it’s heaven when someone takes over that chore for me! Lots of running around and doing stuff all weekend including visiting the MomPear and MomPear-in-Law. I even cleaned up Sarah and Mallory’s room Saturday morning, which I did in place of a workout. I was dressed and ready to sweat on the elliptical but then I made the mistake of walking into the girls’ room and just could not take it ANY LONGER!!!! I don’t know if I worked up a sweat but I worked for a long time getting that room organized (again). It’s beautiful now, but don’t blink or you’ll miss it.

Had an interesting food weekend. I hardly snacked at all. I had 3 squares every day, but the meals were satisfying enough that I didn’t need to eat in between, which is odd for me. The fact that I was pretty busy all weekend probably had something to do with it, but really I didn’t feel the need to find solace in the pantry at all during the weekend. It was nice to not be thinking of food all weekend long. I don’t know if I lost any weight because of that, but honestly I don’t care. I feel like it was an NSV just not snacking my way through the day like I typically do every Saturday and Sunday.

I read a great book last weekend that I am going to review in a few days. It’s all about yoga and pineapples. Sounds fun, huh? Here’s the amazon link  - doesn’t it look cute? I am going to read it again and when I finish I’ll post my review.

Well, I gotta get some work done. Have a good Monday (if that’s possible!).



Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 151 other followers