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A 40-something woman trying to lose 40-something pounds

Monthly Archives: March 2009

Thanks for indulging me in my little pity party in my last post. I was so frustrated, but you all gave me some really good advice that I am going to follow. I realize that I am far beyond Square 1, but man, sometimes it feels so hard to pull yourself up when you get down, but that’s what I’ve got you guys for, right? You are awesome.I made a goals list and I’ll admit it’s slightly ambitious, but I figure if I can meet it at least 75% of the way, then I’ll still be in good shape. Here’s what it looks like:

• Keep calories around 1500 per day. Keep track by logging food into FitDay or by writing it down and looking up cals in my “big book of all numbers related to food”.
• Work out on elliptical at least 3x per week
• Do C25K training 3x per week
• Attempt 30 Day Shred 3x per week
• Assess these goals once a month and make changes as necessary

So, for right now, that’s the plan. Pay day is tomorrow, so I’ll be doing my big grocery shop tomorrow evening and stocking up on lots of veggies and fruit, nuts, and maybe a few little low sugar treats. I think that I really need to focus on portion control – yesterday I very stupidly sat down with a bag of Cheetos Puffs while catching up on my recorded episodes of House and ate waaaaay more than I needed or even wanted. I have noticed also lately that I’ve been eating a lot out of habit – not really the ACT of eating, but choosing foods that, even if they don’t sound good at the time, habit dictates that because it’s there, I should eat it. For example, I went to my mom’s house on Saturday and she  made a Red Velvet cake. I wasn’t hungry at the time and I didn’t really want a piece right then, but I couldn’t stop THINKING about the cake and how my body automatically felt like it SHOULD have a piece. I fought the urge for a couple of hours and then when I did have some, it was a small piece, but I still didn’t really want it. It was VERY good, don’t get me wrong, but I could have not eaten it and been just fine. I thought I had kicked all my old habits last summer, but alas, I was wrong.

The last two times that I lost a significant amount of weight, I can remember telling myself, “I will never go back”. I thought that I was strong enough and smart enough to keep the weight off for good, but weight is sneaky. One pound is no big deal, two pounds is no big deal, three pounds is blamed on water weight, four pounds is cause for concern, and at five pounds you decide that it’s time for action, only the momentum is strong enough now that five pounds turns to ten overnight and you can’t seem to stop the ball from rolling faster and faster. That’s where I am right now. I know logically that it’s up to me to stop it and I CAN stop it, but it feels like it takes a Herculean effort to stop the insanity and get back on track.

Basically what I need to do is bitch-slap myself and quit whining and making excuses and just do what I know I need to do! I’m going to try to follow my Goals List the best I can and hopefully start seeing results soon. My 20 year High School Reunion is in 4 months and I would love love love to lose 20 pounds by then. It’s doable, but it’s going to take a lot of effort on my part. Time to channel that inner Drill Sargeant of mine I think.

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This has been a crazy busy week and I’m so glad it’s almost over. I’m really looking forward to waking up late tomorrow and watching the snow fall – yeah, we’re supposed to get snow! Winter’s a stubborn little kid who just has to get the last word in.

Not a lot happening here. I’ve been working out fairly consistently – putting my running shoes and my elliptical to good use, but my food has been awful. The last year might as well have never existed because I have fallen smack dab in the middle of my old ways. I’m eating crap that 6 months ago I would never have considered eating, ie the corndogs we had for dinner last night. I should have my Mother of the Year card revoked because I fed my family corn dogs and mac and cheese for dinner with nary a veggie in sight. Can you get much crappier than that? I don’t think so. It’s getting close to payday which means the kitchen pantry is at code yellow – not a whole lot to choose from in there. But really that’s just an excuse: I’ve been really lazy about my food. It’s so hard to get back on track when you dive head first off the wagon. I’m still thinking about South Beach again, but then I think I just need to watch my calories, but I don’t want to fill my 1500 cals with brownies and ice cream. I’m going to start my loggin my food into FitDay (again) and see if that doesn’t open my eyes a little bit.

I really think that if I could learn to live without sugar, I’d be golden. But the thought of giving up sugar sends me into a near panic. I’m serious – whenever I read literature about giving up sugar entirely I can feel the anxiety rising in my chest and my pulse quickens. Cutting out sugar and sweets and junk food is almost a foreign concept to me – I can’t quite wrap my brain around it, and I’m not sure I really want to. This sounds weird to say, but I feel like sugar is part of my identity. Being a sugar-holic is a big part of who I am. Other people may not see it, but I know it. Sweets bring me more joy than I would care to admit. Isn’t that sad?

I feel like I am back at square one. I hate starting over.

*Today’s little ray of sunshine of a post brought to you by the letters P,M, and S.


Hey ya’ll.Thanks so much for all of your hugs and condolences. I really do appreciate each and every one of you. I’m doing much better – just needed a break from the blog for a few days.

Not much has been going on. I started C25k again yesterday. I finally found a podcast that would work with my mp3 player (most of the others wouldn’t work, don’t know why) and it makes it soooooo much easier. Hopefully I’ll be able to stick with it this time. I’ve never gotten past Week 4, so we’ll see what happens.

I’ve decided that I am a maintaining machine. I can maintain the same weight for weeks. Now, if I could just lose these last 20, I’ll be golden, hence the C25k. Since the weather has warmed up a bit, I’m more motivated to get outside and move. I even spent some time weeding the flower bed yesterday after my run.

Completely off subject – why do they call it “weeding”? Shouldn’t it be deweeding? Weeding makes it sound like you are putting weeds in, not taking them out. Just something I’ve always wondered…

Anyway, Debby has mentioned the book 100 Day of Weight Loss by Linda Spangler, which I have, but I also have one of hers called Life is Hard, Food is Easy and I happened to flip to a page that suggests you take a look at what has worked for you in the past and try doing that again. Last summer when I lost 33 pounds, I was walking 30 minutes everyday, eating lots of protein, and eating smaller portions of everything else. I was also taking app suppressants, but I really and truly feel that the exercise and diet is what led me to the weight loss. The only thing I’m not doing is weighing in in front of the Nurse Nazi – and let me tell you that was a BIG motivator to eat well and work out regularly. I need to find some way to have that kind of pressure, because honestly, I do my best work when I’m under pressure. Not sure how I’m going to come up with something like that, but I know it was a big part of my success.

Okay well that’s all I can think of for now. Have a great Monday!


So, the big family birthday party never happened on Saturday. My parents are in Galveston with my 93 year old grandpa who is not doing well. He is very sick and may not live much longer. The next time I see my mom’s number on the caller ID, I’ll know why, and I will not take the news well. I’m in total denial and just not thinking about it right now, because when it does happen, I’ll be a mess and I want to avoid that for as long as I can. If you pray, please say a prayer for me and my family. I would really appreciate it.

It’s probably a good thing that we didn’t have the big party, because then I’d be telling you right now about all the cake I ate and how miserable I am, but since there was no cake, there’s no remorse. But honestly, I still wish I’d had a cake for my birthday.

I’m noticing a lot of body image issues around the nets, and I’ve got a post about that brewing in my head, but I want to hear from you all first – do you have body image issues? If so, what are they? If not, how did you get past them? And if you have never ever had body image issues, I want to know what planet you are from and what the weather’s like there. TIA for your help and input!

Keeping it short and sweet today because I have a TON of work to do. Happy Monday everyone.


It’s Ask The Pear day!!  So let’s get to it…

Our first question comes from Nicki: “How do you find motivation and will power when you get frustrated and start caving and want to give in?”Hi Nicki! Great question. Whenever I feel like I’m starting to cave and just want to chuck the whole thing, I remember how badly I feel when I’m not taking care of myself. I know for a fact that if I eat a lot of Little Debbies and spend my days with my butt welded to the couch, then I am going to feel like moss on a rock: slimy and gross. I don’t like how I feel when I do this and when I feel like this, then everything is affected. My self esteem plummets, I get tired and cranky, the husband and kids get on my nerves, etc etc etc, so it’s just better it I keep that in mind when I feel myself going down that slippery slope. Experience is the best teacher – you just have to remember the lessons (I’m pretty sure that last line isn’t original but I can’t think of where I’ve heard it before and a quick Google search didn’t turn up any solid leads – it’s still true though!)

My motivation for working out can come in a number of ways. Mostly I just know that I need to work out at least 4 days a week to feel really good, so I try to keep that good feeling in mind when I don’t want to work out. Also something totally random can motivate me: a song on the radio, remembering that my 20th high school reunion is only a few short months away (yikes), or wanting to wear a certain pair of pants that have been too tight lately. One thing that has really gotten me in gear happened last week, but I’m still feeling the effects: I was contacted on FaceBook by an old college boyfriend. This is the guy who not only broke my heart, but he shattered it into a million tiny pieces, stomped on it and let the pieces be scattered about in the wind. He is in another state, and I don’t imagine that I’ll ever see him again, but for some reason just the fact that he contacted me sent me into a panic, which has led to this feeling that I have to work out as much as I can as hard as I can. Maybe not the best way to get motivated, but I’m going to ride this wave of motivation for as long as it will last. When that wears off, I’ll find something else.

Also, when I really want to give in and have a pity party, I post about it here. Usually the supportive comments are enough to life me up and get me back on track. Never underestimate the power of the blogger!!

The second question is from my good buddy Laura: “Why do I have white flecks and ridges in my nail beds? Am I deficient in some critical nail mineral?”

Yes, yes you are. It’s called the Margarita Mineral and you must ingest at least one margarita per day until you have nails that can cut glass. Okay, that’s a total lie. This is a great question girl, but one that I’m going to have to do some research on, and by research I mean I’m going to ask my neighbor who is a cosmetologist who does nails for a living. After I talk to her and do a little more digging, I’ll get back to ya on this, k? ;)

Third question is from my favorite quilter, Debby: “What is your favorite new healthy food, and/or what is your favorite low cal “fast food” or snack?”

I love this question because I love food. My latest favorites are protein smoothies – milk, a little ice, a scoop of vanilla protein powder, some dark sweet cherries (frozen) and a little honey. So freakin good I can hardly stand it!! I’ll usually drink that after a workout or when I haven’t had a lot of protein that day, and it really hits the spot. Sometimes I like to chew my snacks so an easy one is to mix yogurt with cottage cheese and some fruit. I like ½ cup vanilla yogurt, ½ cup cottage cheese, and whatever fruit I have on hand. Mix it all up and surrender to its creamy goodness! How’s that for “fast food”?

Thanks for the questions, gang! This was really fun and I hope you’ll keep em coming!


Thanks everyone for all the birthday wishes yesterday! I had a good day and guess what?! The wrinkle Fairy left me some nice new wrinkles to commemorate my 38th year of life! Woot!!

SoBe has a new product out called SoBe Lifewater and for today (March 11th) only, you can go to one of their chosen locations and get a free sample! This enhanced water is supposed to be zero calorie and naturally sweetened (although I don’t know what their definition of “natural” is), and they want the opportunity to change the way that enhanced waters are viewed by health freaks like you and me (ahem). You can go here and find the nearest freebie to you, or if you live in the sticks and have no access to free flavored water, then stay tuned to The Sassy Pear for your chance to get a freebie of your very own sometime in the near future (insert suspenseful music here -dun dun dun!!!).

I did a guest post on Cranky Fitness the other day (insert shameless pimping here) and got over 200 hits from people checking out The Pear. Only a tiny fraction of people commented though. Why? Why must you lurk and not say hi to me? Why not come out of hiding and show your fabulous face to the world of The Pear? Do I scare you? Are you just not that into me????? Tell me, I can take it, really. A new blogger who did delurk and speak up is Jessica. She’s a new mom who could use a little bloggy support, so go check her out and say hi!

Remember how a few weeks ago, everyone was doing reviews on POM juice? Well, I forgot to post my review, so here it is. I’m not much of a juice drinker, but pomegranate juice just sounds so exotic, so I tried it. It tastes like a grown up grape juice. I imagine red wine drinkers would really like it, because it is a little dry. My kids thought the bottles were cool, and since they are avid grape-juicers, I let them try it. Kid #1 said, “Hm, it has kind of a funny taste after you swallow it, but I like it”. Kid #2 said, “Yuck”. Kid #3 said, “Mmm. I want some more.” And then within 3 days, there were no more bottles of POM juice left. So I guess they really liked it! I wasn’t crazy about it, but it’s good for a change, so I would recommend it. The bottles are super cute and would make a great winter time craft – paint them white and turn them into snowmen!! A juice that’s healthy and fun? A win-win in my book!

Jessica, the blogger from above (the previous paragraph, not Heaven), asked me a question in the comments and it gave me an idea: I’d like to do a segment called Ask The Pear, in which you ask me questions and I answer them. Or I let someone wiser and more experienced answer them, depending on the question. So for the six of you who read this blog, do you have any questions you’d like to ask? Ask anything – it can be about health and fitness, working moms, women in general, body image, anything that you need an answer for, I’ll try to find that answer. You can either email me (addy is on the top left), or you can ask in the comments below. Fire away, people – I’m ready!!

 Okay, paying job calls me to work, so I’m off!  Have a great day!!


 

I am 38 years old today and I am one of the rare few who want everyone to know it’s my birthday. I love my birthday. I think birthdays should be celebrated to the fullest degree. Did you know that if your birthday falls anywhere between Thursday and Sunday that you get to celebrate your birthday all weekend long? It’s true. I decreed it to be so sometime in the 1990′s. Since mine falls on a Tuesday, I only get to celebrate for one day, but that’s okay because really, how often do we celebrate Tuesdays?

I get my celebratory attitude from my mom. She is the best at making birthdays special. Everybody’s birthday was celebrated with a cake and presents and favorite meal of choice (mine was always homemade chicken and dumplings). My sister went one better while her kids were growing up – she decorated the table early in the morning so that they would wake up to balloons and cake and presents first thing in the morning. My husband couldn’t understand what all the fuss was about when he married into my family. His family doesn’t “do” birthdays like mine does, so I had to educate him on the importance of making sure the birthday girl person has a really great day. The one year he didn’t get me a present, he got fully “educated”, and he has remembered the lesson well!

I feel bad for people who don’t make a big deal about their own birthdays, or who don’t have anyone to do it for them, so I am going to give a gift to all of those people. You have my permission to use my birthday as your own excuse to celebrate! Borrow my birthday today and celebrate it however you choose, just as long as you include something special and out of the ordinary. Go get a manicure, buy that special dress you’ve been eyeing, take an hour to sit outside and read a book – just do something that makes you supremely happy, because you deserve to be celebrated! For at least one day out of the year, we all should celebrate the gift of life we have been given.

Today is going to be a rather ordinary day until 3:30pm. After work, however, I’m going to get a mani/pedi and the hubs and kids and I will go out to eat somewhere, because I am NOT cooking dinner on my birthday. Then on Saturday, the big family birthday party will happen with my parents and my sisters and their families which will include dinner, cake and presents! Yay! We love any reason to get together, but birthdays are especially fun.

So what special things do you do to celebrate birthdays? I’d love some new ideas!

Oh, and Happy Borrowed Birthday everyone!!

 

cartoon by nataliedee.com


Dear Winter Blahs,

Please go the hell away!!! It’s going to be 80 degrees here today, so why are you still hanging around? You are hindering my progress and happiness, and I’m not okay with that so if you know what’s good for you, you’ll hightail it outta here, PRONTO!!

Sincerely,

Jill

PS. Leave all my blog buddies alone too! I mean it!

 

funny dog pictures, loldogs, cute puppy pictures, serious


I got an email today from Kelly informing me that I am on their list of Top 100 Healthy Mom Bloggers.   So go check out the link below - I’m #57 on the list.  I recognized some of the bloggers, but there are a lot of others that I am going to check out.  Gotta love those nurses!!  

http://www.rncentral.com/nursing-library/careplans/top_100_healthy_mom_blogs

 

image from google images



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